Breaking Average Habits

I feel like I am running out of time. I feel like there's so many things I want to do. I'm just surrounded by bad habits. I have this debt hanging over my head still and I just want to pay it off ASAP but I will spend my money on stupid things I don't really want to do because it's what I am used to doing or what everyone else is doing. It's average mentality. I don't associate with that many "successful" people. Well, successful in my eyes at least. Sure they're nice people but I am so afraid of getting stuck and being like everyone else is and the longer I stay here, among the average the more I might lose myself and my dreams because there's ALWAYS something to pay for which sets me back more and more from the things I want to do and accomplish. It seems like every time I turn around, my money is going to something I don't necessarily want or need (and time because the longer it takes me to pay off debt, the longer I have to keep doing this rat race).

There's some amazing people out there but are they living life the way they want to live it? No. I feel like the longer you live a life of average, the faster you settle for just that. I want to learn and grow and do things, always. I feel like I don't have time to be average because there's so much I want to do and need to experience still.

I need to get off facebook. I have been doing really well at removing myself from groups and reducing my notifications (which makes facebook a lot more boring to go onto now since I don't have nearly as many notifications). I do want to keep it for photography purposes communication with family abroad and to read articles about other free spirits who are living their life and networking that way. I need to break the addiction first. I spend so much time scrolling that I don't have time to read, study or practice things that will benefit me and my future. I am scrolling through things I just don't care for and other pointless status updates people post about their day or about how messed up they got that weekend. I feel like we spend so much time on facebook comparing our lives to others, filled with fake friends and posting every little thing about our lives that no one needs to know. I don't think anyone needs to know such intimate details about our lives and we don't need to share everything with everyone. It's ok to have memories that no one else knows about. It's ok to suffer in silence, it's ok to feel joy without needing to tell everyone.

A friend told me the other day "Facebook is an illusion. It's trying to distract us from being the people we should be." I want my facebook and my life to be filled with people who lift me up, inspire me and help me move forward. But that also means spending less time on facebook and more time outside meeting people in person and talking to people.

I need to meet someone who dreams like me. Someone that can help me get to the next step. Until then I am only doing what I can the only way I know how.